Trapped Trauma

Releasing the Trauma of Sexual Violence

I reached a point in my life where I could no longer continue fighting the demons of inner oppression and trapped trauma caused by childhood sexual trauma events. I underwent EMDR therapy for more than a year and a half to release the negative energy and beliefs still holding me captive many years later. During the EMDR process, I would be asked to describe where in my body this dark energy was and give words to explain what it felt like and what it said to me. This was the mental image that would come to mind.

Twisting and Turning.
Deadweight Inside Me.
Yet Alive Pulling On Me.
Grotesquely Knotted.

Will I Ever Get Out
Of This Quicksand?
Will the Flames of Hell
Always Be Attached to Me?
Trapped Inside of Me?

The Anxiety…
Always Lurking…
Waiting to Rise…
Grabbing My Attention…
Energy Racing…
Turning & Churning…
Reminding Me of the Lack of Safety
On the Earth I Must Walk Upon.

I found it to be very healing to put the images to paper and give them the full Light of my consciousness. The Trauma had a voice and it needed the loving action of being seen, heard and acknowledged. I allowed God to come into that energy in my mind and transform it… knowing the energy was not Truth and trusting that God can do All Things.

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