Tonight I meditated with Whim Hof breathing. It’s like rocket fuel for the soul to experience direct connection to Source. The Energy is simply Amazing!!!
I connected with the Mantra…
I AM. I AM. I AM.
“I” on the inhale. “AM” on the exhale. It’s my favorite mantra. I consider it a short and sweet form of a verse in the Holy Bible that always gives me peace.
BE STILL And KNOW that I AM GOD.
I then changed the Mantra. I added ONE Word.
I AM PEACE. I AM PEACE. I AM PEACE.
“I AM” on the inhale. “PEACE” on the exhale. I then thought… “Oh what a longing that must be for God/Source/Consciousness to finally see the people on earth at Peace!”
No more games. No more puzzles. No more confusion. No more trauma. No more suffering. No more isolation. No more inequality. No more racism. No more hatred. No more greed. No more division. No more wars. PEACE!!!
I then embraced Peace into my being. I pondered the idea that God so desires to see ALL the bits and pieces of ITSELF… the Grand Mosaic Puzzle Master… come together in a state of eternal Peace.
Suddenly two puzzle pieces emerged in the blackness of my mind. I saw them draw near to each other like magnets. I heard the click of a linkage as the pieces connected. I felt the energy of being solidly Linked IN. I watched more puzzles pieces appear and begin to connect. The process began speeding up naturally with perfect peace and ease.
I felt the expansion of Love and Joy in my heart as the puzzle was all coming together. God looked and saw what it had made. There were NO missing pieces. There was only Perfect Perpetual Peace. It was beyond GOOD. It was GREAAAAAAT!!!
The first law in thermodynamics is the law of energy conservation. It states that energy can be transformed from one form to another, but can neither be created nor destroyed. All energy is source energy. We are tiny drops in the endless sea of God’s creation that goes on unto infinity and can never be destroyed. God IS perfect love and peace.
May peace reign forever and ever and ever with the gentleness of a light spring shower on a warm sunny day. That’s when rainbows are revealed.
Peace. Peace. Peace be unto us and unto ALL Living Beings.
Do you not believe that I am in the Father, and the Father in Me? The words that I speak to you I do not speak on My own authority; but the Father who dwells in Me does the works. Believe Me that I am in the Father and the Father in Me, or else believe Me for the sake of the works themselves. “Most assuredly, I say to you, he who believes in Me, the works that I do he will do also; and greater works than these he will do…
~Jesus Christ (John 14:10) Prince of Peace
The Kingdom of God is Within YOU. ~Jesus Christ (Luke17:21)
God brought me on a meditation many years ago. He does that sometimes. I closed my eyes and I saw myself. I watched myself from above. I was not myself as I am today. I was a little girl, innocent and pure. I was walking in a secluded field surrounded by tall pine trees filled with the beauty of nature. Even though the sun was shining intensely, the sky was still a bright blue. The colors of everything around me were so vibrant. The harshness of the bright sun washed away nothing. I was so happy.
I met up with other children in the field. We all seemed about the same age. They approached me from different directions. A honey haired girl came from the left. Then a blond haired boy approached from the right. Two other children came walking together from the center of the field, a honey haired boy and a dark haired girl. Like the field, none of us were tainted by the harshness of suffering in this world, not yet anyway. We were open, free and uninhibited. We were all so happy.
We joined hands in the middle of the field and began skipping around in circles like we were playing “Ring Around the Rosie”, but nobody was falling down, falling in, or falling out of the circle. We were solidly joined and content to be playing, laughing and smiling up at the sky and at each other. We all glowed with joy, just like the sun in the sky.
I saw birds of different colors flying overhead above us, like rainbows flying across the sky. I saw animals in the field all around us, going about their business, happy and content just like us. Even the blades of grass and the trees surrounding us were swaying in the breeze, seemingly dancing and filled with joy. It was like heaven on earth for every living being in the field.
Then I and the other children stopped skipping in circles. All at once, we ran to the center of the circle and lifted our arms to the sky. A flock of white doves flew up and out of the center of our raised hands like magic. They flew all around us and weaved their flight in and out of the spaces between us, like angels in flight. Heaven had joined us.
Then we broke from the circle. No words were expressed, but each of us started walking in different directions, filled with a sense of joy and curiosity. Each of us was on a search for something in the field. I instinctively knew when I found what I was supposed to be looking for. It was a pure, white feather. None of its hairs were stuck together. It was perfection. I was so happy I had found it, and yet it felt like I had been drawn to it like a magnet, sitting in plain sight at the border of the field, waiting just for me. I walked back to the center of the field to see what the others had found.
The blond boy who had been on my right was already standing in the center of the field. He looked so proud to have been there first. He had something cupped in his hands but I could not see what it was. He was waiting for the others to return to the circle. I looked into his eyes and they shined with glee and excitement for what he’d found and held protectively in his hands.
The honey haired girl then joined us. She had a leaf in her hand, but it was no ordinary leaf. It was a magnificent maroon colored leaf, laced with bright orange and flecked with gems that shined light like stars, even in the broad daylight. She was overjoyed with her magical leaf that seemed to reflect what was inside of her waiting to shine to the world. I felt a sting of jealousy that her object was so magical compared to my plain white feather, but I quickly pushed the feeling aside and expressed a genuine congratulatory loving smile her way.
Then the honey haired boy came slowly sauntering to the circle. He was holding a simple, gray rock. I pondered to myself why he would have such a boring object, but he seemed quite content with his rock. Then a realization came upon me that the rock seemed a lot like him, solid and steady, unmoved just like a rock. Still, I felt a stirring of pain as if he should have something more significant. Nonetheless, I was happy for him that he was content with who he was.
I then looked at the blond haired boy. He seemed like he could not contain his object anymore, but the dark haired girl had not yet come back to the circle. I looked up across the field and couldn’t see her anywhere. When the two honey haired children weren’t looking, the boy let me peek into his hand. My breath escaped me by what I saw. It was a beautiful baby bird, stark royal blue with white angelic feathers. I looked at him with great joy for what I saw inside his hands. He looked so proud and happy and I was so happy for him. I wasn’t sure if he let me see it because he wanted to let me in on his secret, or if it was an attempt to give the bird a moment of space to see out, as if trying to keep it comfortable and content for a little bit longer.
Then I glanced up across the field. The dark haired girl was coming towards us cradling something in her arms. It was a fluffy white-haired bunny with black splotches. It looked so content in her arms and she seemed so happy to be lovingly caressing that bunny. I sensed the girl and her beloved bunny had quite a lot in common in their journey of life, so soft and vulnerable, a nervous twitching, and an instinctive nature to hop from here to there in self-preservation. Yet here, in this moment, the two of them displayed perfect peace and ease being together, filled with love for each other. Again, I felt a pang of jealousy inside of me. Both the blond boy and the dark haired girl had found living objects and mine was just a left behind fragment of something living. Yet I was sincerely happy for her as well.
Now that we were all joined again, we turned our attention to the blond haired boy. He was struggling trying to contain the item in his hand. I looked into his eyes expecting to see the excitement I’d seen earlier but it was replaced with fear. He did not want to open his hands. I knew in an instant what he was feeling. It had dawned on him that the moment he opened his hands, the baby bird would fly away and he would be left with nothing in his hands. I sensed it was so important to him to have that little bird, to have a precious object of his own. It pained me to watch his internal struggle.
The others began to get anxious. They started to encroach and crowd in around him, excitedly trying to coach him to open his hands. It made him more nervous and sweat began to break out on his brow. I saw anger come across his eyes. My breath became trapped as I watched him tighten his grip on the little baby bird. I could tell he felt a momentary instinct to kill that baby bird rather than let the others smother it by their seemingly demanding demeanors in his state of fright. I glanced in his eyes that were now welling up in tears. I saw deep pain calling out to me wondering what he should do. Everything in him did not want to hurt that baby bird, it was so priceless to him. I gave him a reassuring look of love and understanding, and I prayed to the universe for him to do the right thing.
In a sudden moment, he opened his hands and the beautiful little bird flew from his hands circling all around his head and then landed on his chest. The boy was so happy and relieved that tears of joy fell down his face. It wasn’t just tears that were falling from him. All his fears fell away as he watched the bird flying freely and safe from the others, even from himself. The fear that he would be left empty handed was no longer. The bird had become his friend, content to be with him.
Then we all sat down on the ground and put our objects in front of us in the circle. Everyone looked so happy with their items and to admire the others. Genuine joy was felt by all for each other, except for me. I still felt a pang in my heart for the honey haired boy with his simple rock. I sensed the others were hiding within them a feeling that their objects were better than his.
Then the boy picked up his rock and calmly and playfully tossed it back and forth between his hands as if it was a ball. He glanced at each of us as if waiting for attention reservedly, yet not wanting to be the center of attention. When he knew we were all looking, he opened the rock and showed us all the intricacies inside. There were crystal gems glistening bright light. Then he closed the rock into his hands and it became just a rock again. Then he opened it again and this time there were layers upon layers of colors like sediments in the soil. Once again, he cupped the rock in his hands hiding it from view and when he opened it the last time, there were puzzles upon puzzles hidden within the rock and only he had the answers on how to put it back together. The boy knew all along what was hidden in that rock. Yet he sat there humbly holding it content to have a simple rock. He was no fool.
Then I looked at my plain white feather again and I felt left out. The honey haired girl and boys had their magical items. The dark haired girl and blond boy had their living animals and I just had a plain, white lifeless feather. It looked so insignificant now and it had seemed so special when I found it. Deep within me I felt a searing ache of pain, but I kept it well hidden. Something inside me said not to show it, to just be happy for the others and I truly was.
Then God spoke to me from the sky and from within myself. No one seemed to hear him but me. He said to me “My child, the feather IS your object and couldn’t be more you. It’s the feather of a white dove and doves represent peace in my world. That is what you bring, this is Who You Are, and this is who you have always wanted to BE. Each little hair of that feather is precious and fragile just as you are to me. So take good care of that feather and treasure it as I treasure you.”
I wept because God knew me so well, yet I did not. I did not recognize the value of my object, nor the value of me, but God had revealed it all. It now meant the world to me that he chose that white feather for me and I wept even harder in gratitude for a God that is so knowing and good.
Days later in real life I would find myself walking through the field at the Snug Harbor school behind my home. Sitting on the edge of the field in plain sight was a white feather… just like the meditation… waiting for Me.
With all the wind this weekend, I felt the need to go back and read a blog I wrote almost 10 years ago called When the Wind of Change Calls. At the time, I had been struggling with making my own personal change. After reading the story and reflecting on the global discontentment, I ponder if…
🌬 We are fully awake in the realization we’ve not been living as we are intended to.
🌬 We have exceeded the limitations for what we will accept for our life and humanity.
🌬 We have been engaging in long windy discussions for far too long on social media.
🌬 We have had enough of the insanity known as Step 2 in recovery.
🌬 We are finally ready to surrender known as Step 3 in recovery.
Wind is energy. Like all other elements… Like seeks Like. Water droplets find each other to form rivers and humans find others with their same vibe to form tribes. The wind seems to rage like a reflection of what I see on social media. Clouds are now scarier than I have ever seen them in my lifetime. Have we had enough or are we going to keep going this way destroying hearts, humanity and planet Earth?
I think about the stillness back in early March when COVID hit and all was initially shut down. There was barely any movement in the world and it was like we were all holding our breath on the edge of our seat wondering where it was all going. The winds were silent. It was sunny and still and the skies did not cry rain. There was a Peace but unfortunately it was not a lasting peace.
Perhaps for lasting peace to occur, we need to sit down, get still, be quiet, hit our knees in our hearts and surrender trying to control it by talking about it. Perhaps it is time for each of us to go within and feel and heal our own trauma that adds Energy to the global Winds of unrest.
If you haven’t experienced trauma before 2020, my guess is you have now. It can be debilitating. It hurts physically and emotionally. Hurt people, hurt people. We’ve never had this many walking weapons aimed at each other and we don’t even realize WE are the weapons. Any time we are not feeling in accordance with Peace, we are perpetuating Pain.
Insanity is not just some idea of being wrapped up in a mental institution in a padded room. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and over again excepting different results. It cannot be fixed with an election or a person unless the person is You being willing. I AM.
I want Mind, Body & Soul Health for All!!! ❤️ I want Real Inner Childlike Happiness for All!!! 👧 I have Hope for Humanity… Still!!! 🌈
Despite the intense winds, our silver lining is the Sun has been shining and providing lots of warmth to get out and enjoy nature. Nature is healing naturally.
“The time you take in between the recognition that you need to make a change and when you actually make it, is really nothing other than you… trying to control it.” ~Debra
So here I am beginning to blog. I’ve only been talking about it for a month now but resisting. What was the big hold back? Well… DOUBT. Every time I began contemplating what to write, my thoughts would turn to all kind of questions… the defeating kind of questions… the kind of questions that tell me I’m worthless… the kind of questions that stop me in my tracks from being a useful source to humanity. But the real waste isn’t in sharing worthless material… it’s in not sharing at all. So here I am… writing about the questions.
“Who would really want to read your blog? I mean what makes you so special?”
“What makes you think you have anything worthwhile to say… to read… and do you really think anyone is going to get any REAL benefit out of it? REALLY???? Who are you kidding?”
“Aren’t you being a little high and mighty and grandiose by calling your blog ‘The Calling’?”
“Do you really have a calling? If so, why aren’t you out there ministering to the world instead of spending all your free time on Facebook when you’re not working, doing domestication stuff, mothering 2 kids and hosting a plethora of neighborhood kids?”
I mean look at you Deb… you’ve got THREE kids and one of them isn’t even speaking to you right now. Yeah okay… people love you… people want to hear what you have to say… you touch people alright. Look at all of the people who’ve been fleeing your life because of YOU!!
Ministry should start at home before trying to help heal the world! And look at all the brokenness in the relationships around you that YOU caused because of YOUR decision to divorce your husband!! Look at your damn life for God’s sakes!!! What the fuck are you thinking??? Get a freaking grip!!!
Okay… I’ve said it! I’ve exposed all my fears. I’ve let the cats out of the bag. They can really claw at me now! But maybe… just maybe… the cats needed to be released. Not so I can be wounded by judgment or failure….so I can make space… so the cats can run wild… away from here.
The truth is… there really aren’t any cats… and there is no bag. It’s all in your mind and you don’t really believe what your mind is projecting anyway. Deep down… you believe in YOU… the gentle, loving, strong, giant Light that you ARE… king of the jungle… Leo the Lioness. So let yourself ROAR girl!! Share what you’ve got to say even if you’ve got no clue where you’re going with it. JUST WRITE!!!
Alrighty then! Let’s look at those questions again now that the imaginary cats are gone. Let’s look at them with the eyesight of the Lioness.
“Who would really want to read your blog? I mean what makes you so special?”
Well… LOTS of people! Just look at all the people who read and intimately respond and react to your Facebook stuff. Look at all the people who seem to truly care about Deb and Deb’s world and what Deb has to say. You ARE special because you FEEL special by all of the wonderful people you label as ‘special’ that you interact with. You say it ALL the time… “water seeks its own level”! Believe it!!
I’ll be honest… sometimes I ask myself why people care to interact with me? I am continually in awe over the people… total strangers… who find me on Facebook and make very real soul-felt connections with me. I am amazed at the time people take out of their day to read through what can sometimes be very lengthy threads on my wall or very LONG comments I make on their posts. I know they do because of what they add to the conversation. They WANT to participate and I can clearly see they have a desire to share their own personal experiences, wisdom and words of encouragement with me… not to mention other viewers who may benefit. So yeah! I’ve got an audience and I KNOW it!
“What makes you think you have anything worthwhile to say… to read… and do you really think anyone is going to get any REAL benefit out of it?
Well… let’s look at the evidence. There are numerous people who’ve told you the impact you’ve have had on them by what you’ve shared on Facebook. How many times have you taken a leap of faith and posted things you were hesitant to put out and people have appreciated your honesty or told you it was EXACTLY what they needed to hear? Or how about all the silent observers you thought were laughing at you for putting your personal stuff out there and sharing your candid openness with respect to God and spirituality?
Yes indeed… there have been many of them who have sent private messages to tell you how much you inspire them and given them courage to make some very REAL changes in their lives. Yes Deb, YOU’VE GOT IT!! You’ve got stuff to say!!! Not only that, but the stuff you have to say is THE most valuable stuff a person can talk about… soul stuff! You believe this with all your heart so DON’T doubt the worthiness of what you’ve got to say for a second, because this is the stuff that makes living your life worthwhile. You believe in it!!!
“Aren’t you being a little high and mighty and grandiose by calling your blog page ‘The Calling’?”
Well… NO! One thousand percent NO!!!! Of all the questions you could ask yourself, this one is filled with the most bullshit and you KNOW it! You know it because the answer came so quickly and you felt your energy shifting towards conviction. You can see it in the point blank “NO”, nothing further needs to be said.
Why do I know I have a calling? Well… because I’ve had it for a really, really long time; because I’ve answered it on various occasions in a variety of ways and witnessed the results; because it pulls on my soul continuously in a way that I cannot ignore; because I always seem to be in a waiting state for the next Call; because I’ve experienced the magical mystery of an open line of communication with and without words between myself and others through the speaker of all speakers… GOD.
I’ll never forget when I first knew I was called to be a voice for God in the world. It was at a group gathering held weekly in a private home. Initially, I had been the seeker in that group. I had so many questions and rarely received answers. One member, Kevin Dixon, recognized the strong desire for truth in me and introduced me to another type of group where I engaged in the most soul-searching process of my life. I found the answers… they were within me the whole time. Simultaneously I became engaged to the greatest love of my life… my God.
Well, one Sunday night the topic of the meeting was about the God of our understanding and there were many in the room that had little to no understanding. As each person took turns going around the room, I listened and my heart was breaking… they didn’t know. They were pondering, they were inquiring, they were ridiculing, they were angry at him, but not one of them KNEW God. I could feel an energy building inside of me. It felt like a fear-based energy because there was a heat… a build-up… a rushing feeling inside of me… like a flame turning into a powerful fire very quickly… the fire of God.
When it came time for my turn to speak, I opened my mouth and the words just flowed effortlessly. Gone was the intensity of the fire and it was replaced with a peace. The words that came from my mouth were gentle, yet strong; simple but conveyed deep wisdom; promoting but yet attracting every single person in the room.
I still don’t even remember what I said, but I will never forget the experience of it. There was a spellbound atmosphere in the room. It was as if time stopped and everyone’s souls were wide open and deeply hungry and there was me… I was not the food… but I was the delivery girl. I could literally feel the transference of something going on while I was speaking, as if there was an invisible umbilical cord between me and all of them.
When I was done speaking, the room was speechless and there was a sense of awe in everyone’s eyes that asked “What just happened? What did I just witness? What did I just experience? Give me more!!” I could feel it in all of them. I would hear from each of them individually in the days following telling me how powerful it was.
There was one guy, Wayne, who never looked at me quite the same after that day. He actually made me feel uncomfortable at times the way he would look at me as if I was different. He would openly refer to me with other people as a very deeply spiritual person. I didn’t feel like I deserved this kind of reference because I felt I had only just begun my walk on the spiritual path. Not only that, the power was not from me. I was the messenger but the message was not mine. It was from God.
Because of this experience I knew exactly what the bible was referring to when years later I read it and discovered the passages that said” Jesus spoke as one who had authority” (even though he was not in the authoritative role of a Pharisee), and what Jesus meant when he himself said “These words are not mine, they are from my father”.
To this day, I still get those warning signs that God wants to use me and I am supposed to speak and someone always comes up to me afterwards and confirms I heeded the Call. So why am I not content to just continue to do what I do with speaking? Well… because God isn’t content with that. He’s been calling me into new directions for some time now. I don’t know the “what’s” or the “where’s” but I’ve felt the tremendous pull and I’ve remained open to the details falling into place. I don’t think writing is the only direction he is calling me to either.
Why a blog? Well… a number of people have told me I write beautifully and say I have an ability to share things beyond the copy/paste quotes that I put out daily. It was mentioned to me a while back by my friend Marie that I should start my own website or blog. I tucked it away and felt like it was a good possibility but didn’t feel it was the right time with everything I had going on in my life.
Recently I’ve been developing a new friendship with my co-worker Cindy who is a writer. I shared a few of my writings with her and she spoke to me as “one who has authority” and told me very strongly to “JUST WRITE!!!” It was a different type of authority if you know what I mean (haha). Through my resistance the past month, she keeps encouraging me in a very adamant way. Something tells me she won’t give up until I do it, so here I am. If anyone is helped by my blog, they can thank Cindy, the force who pushed me and helped me set it up. She may not realize it, but she is a messenger herself… because God used her to push me for His purposes.
“Do you really have a calling? If so, why aren’t you out there ministering to the world? And what about your current messed up life situation?”
Well… I believe I have given much to those who appear to be broken or who have vacated my life. I trust that God, in his infinite wisdom and bearer of blessings, is going to be the power that transforms their lives and I am very clear that it’s NOT going to be through me. If I have any part in it at all, it’s only that I allowed the opportunity for God to make such transformations by heeding the very real, very strong Call on my own life for a re-direction.
So what do I hope to accomplish with this blog page? To do exactly what I do on Facebook but on a more extensive level of writing…. to be me… to share me… to share what God would have me share of my doubts, my fears, my strength, my wisdom, my faith, my experience, my hopes and my dreams for myself and the world.
It has always been clear to me I am not supposed to be a religious leader, in part because there isn’t any one religion whose dogma I believe in whole-heartedly and in part because I don’t like the spotlight. I prefer to remain a humble behind-the-scenes kind of servant of God… quietly touching as many lives as I can and bringing healing in a way that allows people to touch and heal a deeper part of themselves and remove what blocks them from knowing true joy, true peace, true happiness, and true love… for that is what God IS.
(Written in 2011… my initial calling… which I heard but put on pause in 2012 due to a detour to love and release a devil disguised as an angel delivered to me through Facebook. It took years for me to recover. Break time is over!!! Time to play catch up!!! ~8/2/2020)
I was just in the most beautiful place with Elaine, one of my most beloved friends, who went to be with God and her mother a little more than a year ago.
I was sitting on a very narrow beach. The color and texture of the sand was so perfect. I was sitting contentedly enjoying its soothing, soft, claylike feel against my skin… digging my bare feet below the surface. The ocean was vast and wide stretching before me. It was the most beautiful shade of crystal clear turqoise blue. The sky was cloudless and bright blue and full of a lightness that lifted and expanded my heart… filling me with a sense of freedom and limitless possibilities… and then there was Elaine.
She stepped out behind a sea wall to my right. She didn’t acknowledge me. She was too taken with the beauty of the ocean herself to notice anyone sitting on the shoreline. She stepped out into the water and I looked on in amazement not believing my eyes. Was this a dream? Was she an apparition? I watched as Elaine walked far out in the water but it was so shallow she never seemed to go below the height of her ankles in the water. That didn’t seem to bother her. She was dancing around in the water everywhere with the childlike delight she always had. She was so happy to be there and I sensed she hadn’t enjoyed this kind of thing in a long time.
I wanted to go out and join her but I was hesitant. I didn’t want to break the moment of just watching her… of seeing her again. It seemed more important to just enjoy watching her than to be part of the experience with her. I had a sense that if I broke the air with my voice to call out to her, the whole scene might disappear. So I just sat and watched… smiling in my heart for the joy that is Elaine… for the joy that she was experiencing.
Then the water turned to ice and Elaine was wearing ice skates. She was gliding around the ice everywhere still dressed in shorts and a tank top and the air was still warm. I got curious and the desire of my heart to be with her was stronger than my hesitancy to just sit and watch. I rose from my spot on the shore and noticed two other people sitting on the other side of the wall from where Elaine had come. I sensed they were with her and had also come from the other side. They didn’t speak to me but their eyes encouraged me to go be with her.
I stepped out into the ice and skates magically appeared on my feet. I pushed off and glided out to be with Elaine. When I got near her, she glided past me with one leg extended out behind her and she smiled the biggest smile at me. She didn’t seem amazed to see me at all. She was just enjoying trying to skate like a professional and she was thrilled that I was her audience watching her do it. I just stood there on the ice watching her glide past me multiple times in that fancy one-footed glide with her arms stretched out in perfect poses. Then she said to me in that cocky, pushy yet joyful all at the same time way she had about her “What are you just standing there for girl? Come on! Try it!!!”
So I began to skate… slowly at first and she kept doing her fancy little poses skating all around me, smiling big smiles, enjoying herself immensely. I let go of my insecurity on the skates, pushed off with force, and did a big one footed glide myself. The two of us were out there on the ice doing fancy one-footed glides in big circles all around each other for what seemed like forever.
Then we met in the middle of one of the big circles. Our hands clasped and we twirled around each other laughing up at the bright blue sky and exchanging laughter and glances with each other. Eventually our speed slowed down. We embraced each other and said how glad we were to see each other again. The hug with Elaine was the longest, intimate, most soul connected hugs I’ve ever had in my entire life. Just writing about it now is bringing tears to my eyes.
Although I was sleeping off my migraine and it was only a dream… in that brief moment of space and time in my mind… I was with my girl… my chickie… my beloved friend Elaine. I was in Heaven.